Don't Shoot The Messenger
by x.Just.A.Phase.x
Summary: Jacob asked Renesmee to marry him, she said yes! But someone has to tell Edward..... and Seth 'pulls the short straw'


**A/N I own nothing **

**and sorry if I got Renesmee's name wrong... **

**Don't shoot the Messenger**

"Seth we've been friends for a while now right?" Jacob coaxed

"Yeah but I like my head on my shoulders" Seth whined bouncing from one foot to the other

"Come on Edward wont hurt you" Jacob sighed getting impatient with him.

"You don't know that" Seth cried flailing his arms around "why don't you just tell him your purposed to Renesmee!"

"Because he's _kill_ me" Jacob pointed out

Seth bounced around on his toes a bit "He probably already knows, the dude can read minds!"

"Why do you think we're way out here!" Jacob sighed flinging his arms out to bring attention to the dry Arizona landscape around them. They were sitting on a porch to a fairly nice little house that was (as far as Seth could tell) in the middle of no where "Why do you think I took her out here in the first place to ask her?!"

Seth looked around and shrugged "I just thought Renesmee should get into her roots ya know Bella being from Phoenix in all"

Jacob rolled his eyes

"Hey don't give me that!" Seth huffed "I can't read minds! Unlike Edward who will hear me and come to kick my butt before I reach the house!"

"Seth? Jake?" Both of the werewolf's turned to see Renesmee stumble out the screen door rubbing her eyes.

It had only been a few years but already she was the size and build of a fifteen year old girl...vampire...thing. Her hair was in a loose knot on her head and she clutched a pink robe tightly to herself. Seth gulped as he took in her disheveled appearance and something inside his brain clicked.

Like the reason Jacob had wanted him out of the house last night...

"Oh man" Seth breathed "You did not...you did not do Renesmee last night..."

He looked at Jacob wide eyed "Edwards not going to kill you man, I take it back. He's going to set you on fire and cut you up in little piece's while you scream"

Jacob whacked Seth on the back of the head "We didn't do anything! She's the image of chastity moron!"

Seth gave her a side long glance and had to disagree

"I could tell him" Renesmee offered catching on to what they were talking about

"NO!" Jacob put his arms around her protectively, Seth cocked a eyebrow at him.

"Sure, it's totally clear who you care about more here!"

Jacob rolled his eyes again.

"He's my father, he wont hurt me" She shrugged, wiggling out of Jacobs grasp.

"But he'll lock you up and never let me see you again" Jacob pouted pulling her into a hug again "If Seth goes and Edward kills him we can always elope"

"_If Seth goes and Edward kills him we can always elope"_ Seth mimicked "heck no man, I have a strong fear of fire and sharp objects"

"Please Seth" Renesmee pleaded with large brown eyes "someone had to tell them. You a close friend he wouldn't kill you, maybe Jake but not you"

Seth grumbled and was about to open his mouth to argue when Renesmee and Jake went in to puppy pout mode. With Jake it didn't do much for him, but he still partly though of Renesmee as a little kid with "Uncle Seth" only to eager to please her.

"Fine" he huffed "but at my funeral I want you two to turn your selfs in for murder and for my body to be buried next to my dad"

Jake rolled his eyes but Renesmee lept at him, pulling him into a over exuberant hug.

"Thanks Seth" she smiled kissing him on the cheek "You can be the best man!"

"Don't I get to decide that?" Jake asked, looking a little jealous that Seth got a kiss.

Renesmee ignored him and beamed up at the two of them "I still can't believe it!" she giggled

"No second thoughts I hope" Jacob smiled pulling her into another hug

"None" she sighed resting her head against his chest

"I've been waiting my whole life for this moment" Jacob sighed nuzzling his face into her hair

"I know" she smiled, getting up on tip toes she kissed him gently.

Seth made a gagging sound and they stopped and stared at him

"I'm going, I'm going" he sighed, starting to take of his shirt.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Not thinking about it, Not thinking about it" Seth chanted to himself as he changed back into human form and started to redress a good mile from the Cullen's present home.

"Not thinking about it" he tried to clear him mind and think about happy things like ice cream or steaks.

Damn now he was hungry

"This totally sucks rocks" he muttered licking his lips trying to avoid thoughts of food and Renesmee.

"Tree's" he though "leaves on tree's are green"

Wandering through the forest he got into the Cullen house that he hoped he would

"Hey Edward" he thought "if you can here me...I need to talk to you"

he broke through the last of the trees to see Edward and Bella standing a few feet from him. He bit his lip and waved. Bella waved back, but Edward was watching him through tight slits.

"Hey...guys"

"Hey Seth!" Bella elbowed Edward in the chest but the vampire barely flinched

"What happened to Renesmee" he growled

"Edward!" Bella gasped punching his shoulder "don't be rude!"

"He's thinking about squirrels Bella" Edward sighed rubbing his arm "He's hiding something"

They both turned back to him expectantly

"Well you see, Please don't kill me" he winced

No one moved so he took a deep breath and plunged on "You see Jacob asked Renesmee to marry him last night, and she said yes"

He flung his arms up in the air trying to defend his face from any oncoming blows. Through closed eyes he heard Bella shriek.

"Edward calm down"

"Oh shit"

XXXXXXXXXX

"I'm really sorry Seth" Bella muttered standing by his bedside, she rubbed her hands together and looked torn between wanting to help him and afraid that if she did it would only hurt him more.

"Yeah me too" Edward sighed "I over reacted"

"Muhhmmmmu hummmm muhhhhhh!" Seth muttered though the bandages

**heheheh I love it!!**

**sorry about any spelling errors that might have slipped through my fingers**

**and remember to review!**


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